Don't Cha
by sci-fi.is.my.life
Summary: Hey, Roxy. Don't Cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? AkuRoku, Zemyx, RiSo, Cleon and a few others
1. Chapter 1

Don't Cha?

Pairings: AkuRoku mentions of SoRi and Zemyx possibly a dash of Cleon in there too.

Summary: Destiny High has a new student. One that takes particular interest in our resident sarcasm loving Blondie.

Author's note: I humbly dedicate this to Victoria Dracelle because I'd like my limbs to stay intact.

Disclaimer: Since Square Enix has decided to reject my offer of a $ 2.38 starbucks giftcard, a pack of bubble gum and a mini water pistol, I do not own Kingdom Hearts. A fact that terrorises me at night. I do, on the other hand, own this fic and all sarcasm used. So no stealy stealy hok? *cracks toe knuckles menacingly*

Enjoy

Sci-fi

'Hey, Roxas. Roxas guess what?!?' I sighed letting my pen drop onto my unfished, due in tomorrow, killing me on the inside, essay that wants me dead, honest to Shiva.

'What, Sora?' He pouted like I told him I'd un over a duckling with my skateboard

'Geusssssssss' Sighing in defeat is the only option now

'Fine you grew another head?' He giggled like the five year old he was on the inside

'No, stupid' Really? Never would have guessed. Do you hear the sarcasm? Feel it.

'Riku got mauled by a Chihuahua?' Sora's eyes widened in shock.

'He did? Oh my God! Is he alright?'

'What? He's fine, Sora. I was just guessing, like you wanted me to' His face lightened as comprehension dawned

'Oh, so he hasn't been mauled by a Chihuahua?'

'No, Sora he hasn't' I raised my face toward the heavens. Why has god chosen to forsake me with a twin brother with the mental prowess and attention span of a five year old.

'Ooooooooooooooh' For the love of Eywa, what did I do get him as my brother? Was I really that bad in my previous life?

'What do you want, Sora?" He beamed at me

'I just wanted to tell you we have a student at school. He's in your physics, chem, bio and English classes' I blinked in surprise. It'd been well over a year since we'd had fresh meat. people don't just move to the islands, it doesn't happen like that. I mused for a few moments on that before a scuffing sound alerted me to the fact Sora was still here.

'So, how do you know that?' He bounced up and down on the balls of his feet smiling his aren't-I-clever smile

'I'm his guide so I compared his timetable to yours and found the classes you have together

'Ok, then' I picked up my pen to return to the essay of death, doom and terror. Hoping that Sora would get the message and leave. No such luck.

'Don't you want to find out what he's like?' Insert world weary sigh here

'No, Sora. I'll find out what he's like at school tomorrow, what I want is to finish this essay that evil butt wipe Xaldin gave us and go to sleep. That is all I want right now"

"So, you don't want me to be here?'

'No, Sora. I want to be alone' Sora's face fell making him look like a kicked puppy

'Oh, ok. I'll see you then' he shuffled slowly out the door. I sighed for the 46,852nd time this month, not that anyone's counting

'Sora …' He faced me sadly

'Yeah?'

'Stay' he stared at me for a few seconds before deciding I meant it before leaping onto my bead from two and a half metres away. He curled up against the wall and grinned at me.

I smiled back and turned to finish my essay.


	2. Red headed ass wad

Don't cha

Chapter One

I woke up the next morning curled up on the edge of the bed, this close to falling off because Sora being Sora had hogged the ENITRE BED.

At least I'd finished that bloody essay, it's only taken me until half two, a new record in the Strife household I'm sure.

Sighing I hauled my ass out of bed, narrowly avoiding an intimate meeting with the floor. Sora moved to cover the vacated space.

"Mmm, Riku" WHAT? That is so gross.

"OH MY GOD, SORA" he shot up, eyes still clouded with sleep

"Wha?"

"You can't say that shit in my bed, go do it in your own, jeez"

"Ohmygosh, I am so sorry, Roxas. I thought I was at Riku's" he leaped out of bed, what is it with him and covering distances quickly, he should try out for track or something, and dashed back to his room.

I, myself spent the next few minutes staring at my bed in horror before concluding that I could guilt Sora into washing my sheets later in the hope it would eradicate any of the gross lovey Riku thought germs.

I don't even want to contemplate what the two of them do together, just thinking about it made my skin crawl.

Shuddering convulsively I made it to the bathroom.

=later after having scrubbed the grossness out of his skin=

With my essay of doom and other assorted deadly homework in my backpack, my backpack on my back, I had nearly made it to the door without being spotted by Sora, when surprise, surprise, I was tackled to the floor.

"ROXYYYYYYY!"

"Sora get off" I shoved at him in a vain attempt to get the idiot off of me. Read: in vain, he had his death grip out and was freely administering, where the hell was Riku when I needed him?

Ew bad mental images.

"Sora, off, can't breathe" he released me but sat on my chest and unleashed 'The Pout'. Now, 'The Pout' is Sora's sure fire way to get whatever he wants. Many have tried to resist its power, all have failed. Parent, friends, lunch ladies and teachers alike.

"But, Roxyyyy, I just want to walk with you to school" I tired to resist 'the Pout' I honestly did, but, as always, failed. You'd think after living with him for 17 years I'd be immune to it, but no, sadly I was not 'The Pout' still held as much power over me as it did when we were three.

"fine, get off me and we'll go" he grinned so big I thought I would vomit from all the fluffy animals, happiness, rainbows and bright neon colours it promised.

"YAY! Let's go" my arm was nearly ripped out of its socket as he yanked me up and dragged me out the door.

We walked to school in the normal fashion. Me walking like a normal, sane person whilst Sora bounced around me, up to the nearest lamp-post and back again, jumping on walls, falling off said walls, all the while chattering incessantly.

"I wanted to go and see Tidus play this weekend but then Riku said that he wanted to show me this place and would take me there this weekend"

And talking

"and then, the duck ran over the llama with a concrete mixer, can you believe it? A concrete mixer. It was so funny, Rox, you should have seen it."

And talking

"I was thinking that we should have soup for dinner tonight. I love soup! Do you like soup, Roxy? Man, we should so have soup tonight"

And talking

"and then Namine said that she'd paint me a picture but apparently she needed me to stay after school but I had soccer practice yesterday so I have to stay today. Oh look we're at school!"

Thank God

"RIKU!" Sora sprinted over and glomped the poor love struck fool to the hard unforgiving ground. Of how I wish id been closer to grind his pretty boy face into the concrete.

"Hey, Sora" I left them to whatever lovey dovey shite they were up to and went off to find Hayner, unfortunately I was side tracked.

"Hey, Roxas" I looked to my right to find Kairi walking beside me.

"Hello, Kairi" she pressed a kiss to my cheek before wishing me a good day and heading off to class.

I wiped my face with the back of my hand. It wasn't that I didn't like having Kairi as my girlfriend, it was that I just didn't like Kairi. Sora and the rest of his group of idiots set us up and just wouldn't take no for an answer, no matter how many times I tried to escape the movies, the restaurants, the roller rink (don't ask) one of the was always there to foil my attempt to escape.

I made it to my locker without too much fuss. I breathed a sigh of relief as I pulled out my history books, happy with the knowledge that I wouldn't have to put up with Sora until lunch.

I was about to slam the door shut when a gloved hand shot out and held it my place.

I turned around ready to stab the bastards eye out.

Instead, I was assaulted with a shock of green and red, and a shit eating grin that made me want to find an eye rape alarm.

"Hey there, Blondie. The name's Axel, A-X-E-L, go it memorised? Cause you're gonna need it when I make you scream"

Not one to stand by when my personal bubble was being invaded, I punched him in the stomach and as he doubled over shoved him, sending him sprawling to the floor.

Instead of staying down as I left as a sane person would do, he got back up leering at me

"Gooooood, I like 'em feisty"

I feel that I can not be blamed when I decked the guy, slammed my locker amd made it to history just in time for the final bell.


End file.
